Saturday, October 27, 2007

Dennis Kucinich: A Nerd's Candidate


Okay, I have to make mention of Dennis Kucinich. He's running for president (duh, like you guys didn't know that.) Okay, that's enough...Have you seen his fucking wife? She a fucking valkyrie. She's so oddly attractive, not to mention the fact that she is a foot taller and like 30 years younger than him. And, she's his wife! It just seems odd. 

Oh look, Elizabeth Kucinich has a malignant growth attached to her hip. I'm hearing it's love at first sight...Christ Dennis, you are one of the luckiest fuckers alive. He's an inspiration to all of the nerdy and homely looking motherfuckers out there. You know what, I think he knows it too. Maybe thats why he's got that old-fucker smile on his face all the time.

Well apparently Glenn Beck doesn't get it either. One night on his telecast he speculated that Kucinich used 'date-rape' drugs to snag his 8-foot tall giantess. Here's a sample from the exchange:

BECK: OK, so I guess we did, you know, make that -- [unintelligible] sees the tongue ring. You see the tongue ring and, and then you're starting to think of things with Dennis, and I don't want to go there.

STU: I don't think you're the only one there, Glenn, but I, you know --

BECK: Dan, show me the picture of her again.

ANDROS: This is her right?

STU: She is very tall compared to Dennis.

BECK: No, Dan just said in my, in my ear, isn't she about eight feet tall? No, she's not about eight feet tall. He's two feet tall. He's Gollum. You take his shirt off and put him in a loincloth, and he's Gollum.

Okay here's something to know about me. I am not registered to vote for two reasons. I personally feel that my vote does not matter, and I also am so politically apathetic that I do not feel the need to. I remain politically unaffiliated...I like being a centrist. Oh, get in there, Gollum...

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